r/Unexpected • u/CuteGrayRhino • 4d ago
Wishing on One Wish Willow
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u/calm_thy_self 4d ago
r/catmemes but that would spoil the unexpected-ness.
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u/Original_Bad_3416 4d ago
Interesting you can see the link through the spoiler block. Don’t think I’ve seen a link in a spoiler block
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u/goose_gladwell 4d ago
Maybe you cant hide subreddits for some reason, nsfw maybe? Dont wanna accidentally open a link to [r/scatmemes](r/scatmemes) at work
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u/Kuro-Tora-59 4d ago
For me its hidden, probably a reddit UI bug
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u/HamsterKazam 4d ago
On my old phone I could just read through spoiler text. It wouldn't layer over it properly.
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u/Fit_Cancel_8747 3d ago
That sounds frustrating. Reddit can be weird like that sometimes, hopefully it gets fixed soon.
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u/Shady_Chaos 3d ago
I don't know if that's a real sub or not and I'm sure as hell not looking to find out
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u/Fr05t_B1t 3d ago
Maybe Reddit should’ve kept the formatting and stuff how it was instead of fucking it up and letting normies be able to format stuff.
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u/QuaccDaddy 3d ago
Thoughtful of you to include a spoiler, but it's crazy to me that some people read through comments before finishing short videos and can't handle spoilers
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u/Not_Tavato 4d ago
I expected him to end up in a nursing home.
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u/TirithNampat 3d ago
I expected him to be a baby.
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u/Soft_Theory_8209 1d ago
Going off the words in his wish, reincarnating as the heir to a vast fortune and possible humane foundation, mass job creator, and/or world benefiting thing without really needing to lift a finger sounds pretty solid.
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u/eltee27 3d ago
I was so sure it would be a mental hospital.
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u/nanadoom 3d ago
Doctors, nurses, and orderlys aren't servants in any stretch of the word. Plus they aren't doing it because they want to
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u/eltee27 3d ago
They are absolutely servants. Just not in the derogatory use of the word.
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u/nanadoom 3d ago
No, they are care givers. Servants give you what you want and work for you. Care givers give you what you need, and they certainly don't work for you. It's more about the power balance and not work
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u/FourDucksInAManSuit 3d ago
Until the end when he said he didn't want anyone's lives to be ruined, I thought it was going to be prison.
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u/SlavCat09 4d ago
I mean I wouldn't mind being a housecat. Do nothing all day and get food and care for free.
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u/Weelildragon 4d ago
No balls though.
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u/GNightP 4d ago
Me being trans and asexual:
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u/FerreiraMatheus 3d ago
Holy moly, I think that's a first for me. It's now obviously, but trans and asexual is new for me.
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u/SendMeF1Memes 3d ago
I would like to be those housecats which can leave the house whenever, but being a housecat to a nice family is nice too. Very chill, maybe boring but I could always annoy the slav-home owners.
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u/micromoses 4d ago
Yeah, but you’ll lose most of your sense of taste.
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u/IAmRules 4d ago
Money man, you just want money, that dude who wished for a billion dollars nailed with without even trying.
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u/shyaznboi 3d ago
Still have no idea why he bothered to come up to their house exclaiming he got billion dollars when it literally happened in front of them just moments before
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u/Soft_Theory_8209 1d ago
Using monkey paw logic, my best guesses for his catch are: IRS screwing him out of most of it, the cash itself being counterfeit, a bunch of family dying for your inheritance, instant inflation and/or an apocalypse making it useless, or actually storing that many paper bills safely without the government or gangs coming after you.
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u/Gonzappa92 4d ago
I wish I could trade lives with my dog so bad😂
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u/R0sewoodRibbon 4d ago
Honestly, same. Their biggest problem is probably deciding where to nap next.
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u/DagothNereviar 4d ago
Wish granted! Now your owner is a dog in a humans body, has no idea how society works, loses their job and income, doesn't pay bills, is eventually sent to prison over massive amounts of debt and you're sent to the pound.
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u/NaturalBornLucker 4d ago
He forgot to add a clause against neutering
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u/wakeupwill 4d ago
Would fall under the "no harming" clause.
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u/NaturalBornLucker 4d ago
I'm no lawyer but when we neutered (or sterilized, dunno correct word) our cat, we didn't think of it as harming her.
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u/CatRockShoe 4d ago
I was actually just thinking the other day that I wouldn't mind at all being someone's pet cat
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u/APiousCultist 3h ago
Spend all day sleeping, die by age 15. Can only express life's problems as loud meows. There are some downside.
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u/OuttHouseMouse 4d ago
Tries calling the help line on back of box:
"Hi yes, can i help you?" "meow meow meow, meowmeowmeow meow"
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u/Artzebub 3d ago
They get that a lot. And wof, wof, wof, and help! I'm a human trapped in a parrot!
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u/blindseersarasti 3d ago
Honestly the one wish willow isn’t really ever shown to be a monkeys paw, the main wish was just kind obviously a terrible wish
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u/Soft_Theory_8209 1d ago
Granted, we only see one other wish, and it is possible they just seemingly didn’t give him a drawback because they forgot to or didn’t think it was importantly enough to include/contribute to the story. Although, yes, many have speculated he just made a terrible, overly selfish wish and was punished for it.
On that note, while they don’t seem to have plans for it, the concept of the one wish willows has basically given the creators a gift wrapped potential film series exploring different wishes and their catches.
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u/Deivedux 4d ago
Just wish for a billion shares of some ETF, like All-World or S&P500. A good enough head start into financial independence.
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u/Indercarnive 3d ago
Just wish for a billion dollars ( or more). It literally happens in the movie with no adverse effects. The wish isn't some monkey paw or genie trying to twist. Bear's wish turns out bad because it's a fundamentally bad wish.
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u/arrkaydee 3d ago
To be fair, we don't actually know if it has any adverse effects because of what happens immediately after he makes the wish. We also have no context as to whether or not it's a monkey's paw because we don't see any other wishes.
For all we know, the money was taken from a bunch of charities and now a ton of people are going to die because they no longer have the help they need.
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u/Thin-Nerve6367 2d ago
Plus there's no guarantee the IRS won't be on his ass.
I'd just make a wish that says "The next three lottery numbers I choose are winners"
Boom, done. Win the lottery once and then only get another one - or two - tickets if I absolutely need the money
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u/arrkaydee 2d ago
Unfortunately, you need 7 winning numbers to win the jackpot and you only have 3, so you've won $10.
Gotta be more careful with wording your wish!
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u/Thin-Nerve6367 1d ago
😆
The next 3 lottery tickets I hold in my hands are winners
I think that's good
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u/arrkaydee 1d ago
A cashier hands you your receipt but accidentally also gives you three winning lottery tickets someone else just cashed in. They're of no use to you.
Alternatively, you win $30. Your tickets were winners, but not jackpot winners.
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u/SlobberyFrog 1d ago
We know the guy from store made a wish tho no ? Didn't he wish to have the store he owned in the movie or smth?
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u/arrkaydee 1d ago
I don't think he ever says what his wish was, so it could have also gone wrong, but not catastrophically so. I could be wrong, though.
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u/Icura71 4d ago
The shares would have to be stolen from someone. Or a single share split into a billion shares...
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u/Omnom_Omnath 4d ago
stealing isnt legal. just add some numbers to their digital bank account, no harm no foul. its all a grand-societal illusion anyhow.
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u/shyaznboi 3d ago
SPY has 1.05 billion shares. If you monopolize almost all of it, people will just use a different ETF. Making your billion shares worthless
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u/Wazula23 4d ago
I think being a well-cared for housepet might be the peak of consciousness. So I call it a total win.
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u/GainsayRT 3d ago
''I wish the richest man on earth, whoever that may be at the time, would want to donate 1 million dollars to me each month, out off the kindness of their heart''
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u/Beaufort_The_Cat 4d ago
lol honestly my first move with one of these would be to hire a team of lawyers to make it foolproof and tell them to write themselves in to the wish to get paid
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u/Fr05t_B1t 3d ago
No no, they will be satisfied with the work that they did so much so, that compensation is not necessary.
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u/SpartArticus 3d ago
Literally just say i wish to legally have a trillion usd in my bank account that is valid and can be used and doesn't cause the economy to change in any way because of this
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u/100YearsWaiting2Shit 4d ago
I've been thinking about this since I saw the movie. The best course of action is to wish for a magical object. It's shown it can make money appear out of thin air so I won't ever make a wish that would involve changing my being. Even wishing for more confidence has me terrified how it'll fuck my brain up. So I'd just wish for some object to benefit my quality of life like a bullshit detector or a never ending heal all medicine with no side effects in a forever refilling bottle
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u/TheRealRiceball 3d ago
Is the One Wish Willow established to be a monkey's paw situation? From what i remember of the movie it seemed pretty generous, just that Bear made a really dumb wish
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u/100YearsWaiting2Shit 3d ago
Less about it being a monkey's paw and more about me not trusting myself and being indecisive so my indecisiveness might mess with the quality of the wish
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u/Soft_Theory_8209 1d ago edited 1d ago
Obligatory: I wish I knew what to wish for, which becomes hilarious with it being ONE wish (unless you later pull off the mother of all manipulations on someone).
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u/100YearsWaiting2Shit 1d ago
I have genuinely thought of the strategy of buying two and giving it to a family member saying to wish that I knew what to wish for
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u/Affectionate-Boot-12 4d ago
Just wish for all of superman’s powers without any weaknesses. Done!
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u/Fr05t_B1t 3d ago
Well his weakness doesn’t exist in reality
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u/veritasmahwa 3d ago
Constantly caring for everything to move around seems exauhsting. I dont wanna live in a world that feel like cardboard. Maybe something less powerful but still overpower in real. First i thought of Goku but then i notice i still need to train myself. Then i thought of Mob(Mob psyco 100) but then i notice i may not be able to control it properly. Who to pick? Yujiro hanma?
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u/Furebel 3d ago
Wishing for money making machine will make you be jailed for fraudulent money printing. Wish for a machine that without any material or energetic input with effortless press of a button will instantly generate fully edible, healthy to eat and moderately tasty chicken nuggets with exact atomic structure as regular man-made chicken nuggets. The machine will require no downtime, maintenance or cooldown and it will be fully waterproof. One press equals one chicken nugget.
No way to worry about food will already cut most of your issues. Because the device is infinite food with no hooks (i hope) you can sell chicken nuggets too. Why moderately tasty tho? Because if you have the best chicken nuggies, you might draw too much attention, and if you eat it yourself over and over, other food might get dull, and you can still spice it up to your liking. Still, you can sell them for dirt cheap, and it will still be a huge return to you for the simple reason of how insanely lot of them you can produce for zero cost. This solves joblessness and homelessness issues. The only thing you should be afraid of is thieves, but if you play your cards right, you will be able to quickly afford security systems to protect your chicken nuggies machine and yourself. You could surely ask for more, but each wish and its modifier comes with a huge risk, so its better to come up with one straightforward wish, describe it as best as you can, and prevent catches.
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u/ChuckDeBongo 3d ago
I thought it was going to transform back as a child so his mum and dad could look after him all over again…
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u/Joe_Spazz 3d ago
My grandfather used to say he wished he would be reincarnated as an American dog.
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u/Rogueshadow9087 3d ago
Soo... he should have just wished to be the legal recipient of legal dividend paying stocks, where the dividend income amounted to about the median houshold income.
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u/SaurikSI 3d ago
I’d just wish my life to be perfect. Nothing that could make me sad could happen, so indirectly it would help others as well.
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u/Conscious-Struggle45 3d ago
I wish for everything I want to come true in the way I intend it to come true and only if I actually want it and without any permanent consequences I can't undo.
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u/SpinachSpinosaurus 3d ago
until he cracked it I thought he was going to be a child again, living with his parents...... And when He said "do not ruin somebody's life with that wish", it became somewhat clear in hindsight that...this wasn't what was going to happen.
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u/Ser_Daniel_The_1st 3d ago
Sometimes when making wishes you can’t account for everything which will inevitably fuck you up.
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u/theGamingdutchman 3d ago
I'd wish to restart my life as the best version of myself, which would include taking away all the weird annoying or harmful quirks my body has. To basically be me 2.0, to have access to my current memories if relevant or if I tried but to be otherwise unbothered by my current attempt at life.
To still be (mostly) the same person in my core and to mostly still meet the same people. But for it all to be the BEST i could've been. To be a driven, ambitious and happy person.
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u/MrJakuubix 3d ago
Cool joke, but the point of the movie was that the One Wish Willow is NOT a monkey's paw that purposefully fucks you over
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u/Gin4Gingers 1d ago
Fun fact! The one wish willow is not a monkeys paw. It gives you exactly what your wish is, exactly how you expect it to be. The only reason it went so bad in the movie is because bear was mentally unstable and he truly wanted her to be that obsessed but didn't expect the consequences. Hence his medicine cabinet and also how the wish for a billion dollars didn't come with a downside because that guy wasn't mentally unstable and really just wanted a billion dollars
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u/WitchesTeat 1d ago
I called it as soon as he finished the servant bit and I was not disappointed
Always specify it not ruin your life, either, and that you enjoy the outcome with a mentally and emotionally sound and stable mind
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u/VortexLord 4h ago
If the person wish for infinite money what is the monkey paw outcome? Other people receive less salary or-?
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u/EcstaticActionAtTen 4d ago
Ppl hate ai with a passion but we came to the Internet to escape the FCC but everything is censored for monetization and stuff like unalive is normalized
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u/post-explainer 4d ago edited 3d ago
This comment has been marked as safe. Upvoting/downvoting this comment will have no effect.
OP sent the following text as an explanation why their post fits here:
He tried to wish very carefully, but ended up as a cat.
Does this explanation fit this subreddit? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.