r/funny • u/LurkisMcGurkis • 1d ago

I bought this at the Blue Springs State Park gift shop...Its in 3DDD

Post image
40.6k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

877 comments sorted by

•

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4.1k

u/Linkdes 1d ago

Please tell your manatee to stop staring at me

402

u/TappedIn2111 1d ago

It is staring at the guys to your left and your right.

36

u/mapleleafraggedy 1d ago

That's what happens when you have mostly peripheral vision

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63

u/Tower21 1d ago

It's like those paintings where the eyes keep following you.

I blame the Parkinson's for knowing this.

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26

u/dearmrfrodo 1d ago

When you stare at manatee, manatee stares back onto you. -Nietzsche

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20.1k

u/Flip_Six_Three_Hole 1d ago

Careful, manatees sometimes get hit by motorboats

2.5k

u/mientosiempre 1d ago

I'd like to think the designer of this tee knew exactly what they were doing

996

u/Own_Round_7600 1d ago

His cheeks are supposed to wobble when you walk

421

u/mapleleafraggedy 1d ago

"And for my next act, I'll make the manatee... chew his food"

112

u/Le_Poop_Knife 1d ago

https://www.reddit.com/r/justgalsbeingchicks/s/V9FGbdlTLl

41

u/WatermanQuink1 20h ago

she breasted googly

55

u/kcolrehstihson_ 1d ago

My eyes are down here

11

u/FermentedForeskins 18h ago

I am still amazed nobody made that Manatitty joke yet

3

u/Plus-King5266 1d ago

To the window
To the walls

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83

u/MentalOpportunity69 1d ago

I like to think of this as a mana-tee.

66

u/werther595 1d ago

Containing the manatitties

20

u/ScaleneWangPole 1d ago

The mana is stored in the mammary gland

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16

u/MightEMous 1d ago

manateetees

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763

u/grumblewolf 1d ago

👏👏👏👏

122

u/mapleleafraggedy 1d ago

That ain't the only kind of clappin' happenin'

220

u/msb2ncsu 1d ago

You should be able to retire from this post. Fucking magical.

8

u/BlangBlangBlang 15h ago

They should but instead management is just going to expect this level of quality forever and they're still gonna pay them same as the rest of us. Thats why I only do mediocre comments and clock out at 8 hours. Don't call me after 5 talking about tomorrows comments.

250

u/haringtiti 1d ago

this is the most clever comment ive ever seen. you son of a bitch, you did it.

129

u/Soulless--Plague 1d ago

You motorboated her didn’t you? You motorboating son of a bitch

74

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Is she still in the house?

29

u/Soulless--Plague 1d ago

You stop projecting on me! Why don’t you go enjoy yourself while I go ice my balls and spit up blood.

11

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Could have been the midnight gay art show

7

u/frogguts198 1d ago

You ol’ sailor!

136

u/BladeRunner2022 1d ago

You will never have a more perfect moment in your life. This is your peak.

50

u/semperknight 1d ago

I'm out. Not even going to attempt to top that one.

41

u/WhiteChedderMane 1d ago

Very witty. Nice handle, Rico. Only good bug is a dead bug.

53

u/Channel250 1d ago

Annnnndddd. Its dead Jim.

Whenever I think I'm Uniquely funny. I just hop on reddit to humble me.

62

u/Atophy 1d ago

I laughed so hard I couldn't hit like for a few seconds ! 😆👌

26

u/Jack_Mackerel 1d ago

It's rare that you see a perfect comment, but here we are

5

u/SmanginSouza 18h ago

Damn. This is like the dad joke final boss right here. Udderly hilarious.

13

u/Mateorabi 1d ago

Oh the huge mammaries!

11

u/spitz6860 1d ago

If there's only one joke left on earth, let it be this one

10

u/Shuiei 1d ago

Close the thread, we peaked.

5

u/UpgradeCheetah 1d ago

You ole sailor you!

9

u/Chrysocyon 1d ago

Its always an honor to be present at the unveiling of a brand new joke. Nice job!

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3.9k

u/phallic-baldwin 1d ago

Manatittee

749

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Hahahah yasss

180

u/lostshell 1d ago

Careful. My gf boops every snoot she sees

139

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

She can do it , I wont tell FFAW

60

u/LurkinGherkn 1d ago

Ayy that’s a nice username

57

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Spider man pointing meme

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39

u/Mtolivepickle 1d ago

Sha’mon

18

u/Batmansbutthole 1d ago

Aww if these were actually man boobs that pun would have double slapped

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729

u/CopperRed3 1d ago

Oh the huge manatee!

104

u/furiouspossum 1d ago

Oh the huge mammaries!

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33

u/AngryTree76 1d ago

There’s a manatee?!

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1.2k

u/OddlyGodly4 1d ago

I bought the same one, but mine was only 2D… 😞

698

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Blessed with tits cursed in life

280

u/mapleleafraggedy 1d ago

"My steak is too juicy and my lobster too buttery"

265

u/Stormfly 1d ago

I dunno... sounds like they're saying "I've the butteriest lobster in the world but I'm allergic to shellfish."

61

u/somecasper 1d ago

"This thermidor is killing my back"

35

u/DasChantal 1d ago

my steak is too juicy, and the lobster is trying to stab me with the butter knife

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10

u/Ender_Wiggins18 21h ago

🫠 I am 34DD and I complain. You're a trooper OP.

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196

u/Johnny-zamboni 1d ago

I just want to pinch his cheeks!

22

u/BizzyM 1d ago

tickle its whiskers.

123

u/Alassandros 1d ago

I read it as 36DDD four times in a row. My brain just corrected what wasn't wrong 😂

38

u/Smelly_God 1d ago

I was looking at the comments wondering if she explains why her boob size was relevant... Until I read this comment and got the joke

6

u/socool111 1d ago

Yeeepppp same here

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80

u/ArgentoFanUK 1d ago

At my age that manatee would be looking sad and downwards. 😆

75

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

If they are this big, you did what you could, your service will not be forgotten

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526

u/dconnolly55 1d ago

Aaaaaaand RIP to your inbox

119

u/norsurfit 1d ago

https://media1.tenor.com/m/po-UiIbWBlQAAAAC/hot-dog-girl.gif

73

u/AlmostLucy 1d ago

>hot dog girl
That’s no mere hot dog girl! That’s renowned author and video essayist Lindsey Ellis, in a refined and deep examination of Freddy Got Fingered.

81

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Daddy would you like some sausage

17

u/Saul_T_Bauls 1d ago

Backwards man the backwards man I can walk backwards as you can

14

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Daddy would you like some sausages

9

u/LASERDICKMCCOOL 1d ago

🎹 🧵 🌭 🎹 🧵 🌭

9

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

This was at the bottom of my AIM profile.

6

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Crying🤣🤣

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10

u/Next_Instruction_528 22h ago

Your profile has nsfw warning on it so I'm sure alot of guys are getting real excited then disappointed when there are no titties.

Not me though that wouldn't be me

10

u/arfelo1 1d ago

Poor Lindsay is never going to escape that gif

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75

u/j0llyllama 1d ago

Spot the finger

68

u/zuckertalert 1d ago

NEVER noticed that

19

u/PunJedi 1d ago

Same! I question my reality more and more each day.

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14

u/mapleleafraggedy 1d ago

Full of people asking about where they can get the shirt too... right?

16

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

They may have it in the store, but im thinking they are going to start using AI to make the shirts. If you look closely at the left bottom of the shirt there is an artists name. Thats going away if this gov has anything to say

3

u/DrVW 16h ago

Whoosh

104

u/Shaw-eddit 1d ago edited 1d ago

Man what a tee shirt

Edit:

Man, ah t-shirt like yours is a real treasure.

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96

u/perfect_insanity93 1d ago

I love how its 3d.

Like he wants some lettuce

101

u/AnotherAngryOldGuy 1d ago

Manatee is like, "thanks for looking in my eyes".

81

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

No one ever really sees me. Manatee probably

23

u/TheLittleNorsk 1d ago

I am the eggman

I am the wallrus

boobboob kachoob

15

u/MCMXCIV9 1d ago

Tell your tits to stop staring at my eyes

15

u/micrplasticmacrballs 1d ago

I'm something of an endangered species myself.

36

u/beanandween 1d ago

That's a boopable snoot

40

u/Snakend 1d ago

Would be impossible to look you in the eyes when we talked.

21

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Yeah you might trip and fall

16

u/Snakend 1d ago

at least it won't hurt.

42

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

If you land on the manatities

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26

u/Matchbreakers 1d ago

Boop the snoot, get sexual harassment charge.

48

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Haha and irl you get caught harrassing an endangered species, fine 50k to 100k and up to a year in jail. Sexual harrassment on a woman... No fine, prove it and still nothing.

16

u/ConstructionSafe2814 1d ago

You can get elected as president.

28

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

We already have a tit as president

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12

u/GTowner 1d ago

I am concerned for humanatee

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29

u/954fla 1d ago

Manatees are protected marine life and are illegal to touch….

But I’m a motherfucking criminal

7

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

You had me in the first half

10

u/sublevelstreetpusher 1d ago

Im never going to look at a manatees the same way now

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10

u/LordBiscuits 1d ago

Girl I hope you have good bra money or you're gonna suffer 😂

5

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Already am haha its def a mixed bag for sure

12

u/xtothewhy 1d ago

My nostrils are up here.

7

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Hahaha yessss

8

u/tbia 14h ago

Remember, motorboating is one of the major causes of harm to manatees.

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13

u/guambombboy 1d ago

ManaT-Shirt!

I remembered that from one of the Powerthirst videos on College Humor.

5

u/Devo27 1d ago

Ah yes, Picnicface. One of the finest comedy troupes to come out of Halifax NS.

3

u/TheRealRickC137 1d ago

Support Steve Little and watch Gary and his Demons!

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13

u/beyonddisbelief 1d ago

Man, 3DDD printing technology has gotten good these days.

7

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Almost beyond belief

5

u/LongPorkJones 1d ago

Oh, the huge manateats!

7

u/Specific-Morning-985 1d ago

Rip your inbox

10

u/mtgfan1001 1d ago

Huge tracks of manatee 

7

u/Enki_007 1d ago

But I don’t want to get married. I just want to …

8

u/CheshireBloke 1d ago

Stop that stop that, you're not going into a song while I'm here!

6

u/Sp0ngebOb1268 1d ago

Manatitees

4

u/Suitable-Peanut 1d ago

This is the most perfect boob-to-shirt ratio I've ever seen

5

u/T1NF01L 17h ago

Man. A tee.

5

u/spicesickness 17h ago

It’s a manatitty.

11

u/pony_el_mexicano 1d ago

Hey boat, my eyes are up here.

8

u/Jemworld 1d ago

Stuck in bed with a horrible temperature and cellulitis and this gave me a good chuckle so thank you.

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9

u/imnotmarvin 1d ago

People checking the profile for NSFW, shame on you/us. 

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3

u/Effective_Review9415 1d ago

The shirt design is way too accurate 😂

4

u/KrampyDoo 1d ago

This picture is peak mammal.

4

u/swdna 1d ago

im just … a huge manatee

  • the moldy peaches

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5

u/Humaniak 1d ago

RIP your dms

5

u/itsagoodtime 1d ago

Save the mamatees

4

u/bogartis 1d ago

How many marshmallows does he have in his mouth???

6

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Now that is a thought provoking question... At least tree fitty

10

u/TheMissingSpartan 1d ago

I think you mean free tiddy.

5

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Ahhh i was so close

4

u/collapse-and-crush 1d ago

I want to pet that dawg

4

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Can i pet that dawg, can i pet that dawg, CAN I PET THAT DAWG

3

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Bugs bunny meme NO

4

u/big_daddy_dave 1d ago

ManaTeeTees

4

u/BBQ_IS_LIFE 21h ago

Rest in peace to your inbox 🤣

5

u/Intrepid_Ambition940 19h ago

I disbelieve, Need to see it from multiple angles to be sure.

7

u/marzred7 1d ago

Cheeky.

7

u/meshuggahsenpai 1d ago

Why nsfw wtf

9

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

I was wondering the same, im thinking the convos are suggestive, that could be it

5

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Oh looks like it was on there and I removed it

14

u/Civil-South-7299 1d ago

Disappointed this wasn't a sneaky OF plug

10

u/pleasetrimyourpubes 1d ago

Tbh their whole post history is just interesting bangers tho...

10

u/AgentMouse 1d ago

checked out her posts and wasn't disappointed! I giggled, then got hungry, then giggled again, then got hungry again. 10/10

7

u/solthar 1d ago

Oh, the huge manatees.

14

u/pbetc 1d ago

Your penis looks great

19

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

Feels great!

7

u/Kayfith 1d ago

What? Does this have some other entendre?

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3

u/PsyduckPsyker 1d ago

Okay wait this is actually hilarious.

3

u/sanosake1 1d ago

your poor inbox...

3

u/JoshDM 1d ago

RIP your DDDMs.

3

u/Odd-Pear692 1d ago

Manatidddy

3

u/slimj091 1d ago

It is surprisingly dimensionally correct.

3

u/tomashcroft89 1d ago

I spent the last 10 minutes thinking this was a manatee's soft toy.

3

u/code_monkey_001 1d ago

Oh, the huge manatees

3

u/Munkeyman18290 1d ago

Mana-tiddies.

3

u/CowGlittering745 1d ago

You got my attention. Now, what are we talking about?

7

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

How the ruling class is taking over... These titties

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3

u/chindo 1d ago

A bit of a manatease

3

u/Otheus 1d ago

Amaze!

3

u/MorningMushroomcloud 1d ago

Usually a person has to travel to an I-Max theater for this level of realism?!?

3

u/Odd-Rain6784 1d ago

36DDD is more like it

3

u/Homersarmy41 1d ago

Manateetee

3

u/bactchan 1d ago

Today's superbest favorite animal is called a mannatitties.

Creepy Dave! Okay bye.

3

u/original_greaser_bob 1d ago

good bye to your in box

3

u/TorrenceMightingale 1d ago

These are great.

3

u/StardustJojo13 1d ago

Hilarious 😆 As a girlie that is also DDD+, I really want that shirt! Is there a way to order it online

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3

u/Alewort 1d ago

♪ Nature trail to heckin'-big-manatee ♫

♫ Nature trail to heckin'-big-manatee ♪

♪ Nature trail to heckin'-big-manatee ♫

♫ In 3DDD......... ♪

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3

u/HotelOne 1d ago

I’m sure someone got there first but I’m a lazy scroller - “Oh, the huge manatees.” Thank you for coming, I’ll be here all week.

3

u/jpkviowa 21h ago

Prepare for Inbox hell

3

u/DoctorVeggies 21h ago

Manatitty

3

u/sgtmuffins98 20h ago

The manatee tee on the manatitties

3

u/StankFist1397 18h ago

That shirt fits you perfectly

3

u/ShannaGreenThumb 17h ago

Manateetee’s

3

u/csbarbourv 17h ago

Oh the huge manatee!!!

3

u/lzwzli 16h ago

Manatits

5

u/TheGruenTransfer 15h ago

Remember, it's illegal to touch a manatee, but if they touch you it's alright 

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3

u/PufferFish_Tophat 15h ago

Boop the Snoot

6

u/Scotsburd 1d ago

Girl, your poor back!!!

4

u/johnsgurl 1d ago

This is awesome. As a former DDD, I might have kept them if I knew of this shirt.

4

u/LurkisMcGurkis 1d ago

You can have them back, ill donate

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