r/nextfuckinglevel • u/8O8I • 6h ago
A polar bear literally trying to figure out how to eat them. These guys being nonchalant af
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u/TypicalPerformer6952 5h ago
He just wants a coke
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u/James_White21 5h ago
Aww just wants a cuddle, tickle his nose
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u/ImTalkingGibberish 1h ago
Ironic coca-cola being linked to polar bears and global warming at rhe same time
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u/a1oner_bvcksn6 5h ago
Where's the next, where's the level, and--most importantly--where's the fucking?
Also, never fucking tease any animal that can easily rip you apart
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u/xBad_Wolfx 5h ago
The very short period I worked way up north on oil rigs we had a “pet” polar bear. They are almost impossible to relocate due to how far they can range so until it managed to actually kill someone they weren’t going to touch it.
It came close several times, almost got a coworker but he escaped into a vehicle and then several others drove it off before it could get into said vehicle. Almost ate one of our surveyors but he got onto the snowmobile in time and outran it.
We had similar sort of ports on our walkways but they were slightly smaller than the ones here that it used to try and shove its head through but it was so tight it basically couldn’t do anything. People would give it pats when it stuck itself like that from time to time.
It once got into a storage shed at the airstrip because there was one tiny perforation in the steel wall and it tore open corrugated steel like it was tin and ate a whole crews worth of rations for 6 months. I have physical pictures back home (Canada) of it sitting on its ass like a big toddler munching away.
Very cool animals, but no video can convey just how powerful and large they really are. It’s also really weird to see a creature act like the biggest idiot while covered in gore from things it’s killed.
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u/Nervous_Produce1800 5h ago
Almost ate one of our surveyors but he got onto the snowmobile in time and outran it.
Some freaking Call of Duty level sequence here
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u/usps_made_me_insane 3h ago
I can not imagine how fucking scared he was...even the time spent just turning the key and starting the engine must have taken a solid year off his life.
Imagine looking back and realizing it js slowly gaining on you as you scream at the snowmobile to go faster....lol
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u/xBad_Wolfx 3h ago
Oh no, we did not turn them off if we needed to stop somewhere. Being able to move quickly was critical… also restarting them in the cold is never guaranteed.
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u/homosapien12 1h ago
The story reminds me of this video https://youtube.com/shorts/8epEpYR36ps?si=I4qeo-ZtQIhkmXCy
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u/illmatic708 4h ago edited 4h ago
I saw a video on reddit of a dude jumping on a snowmobile to get away from a polar bear, was that your surveyor?
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u/xBad_Wolfx 3h ago
Not him but by all accounts pretty much the same thing. I did see the escape into car which was also about that close.
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u/UniqueAd7770 5h ago
That sounds fun and horrifying at the same time.
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u/xBad_Wolfx 3h ago
Yes. Also backbreaking and colder than you could imagine. Do not miss that job. Bears were cool though.
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u/skyguy_22 5h ago
I am sorry, Sir. This is r/nextfuckinglevel. There one is without actual fucking. You are looking for r/nextlevelfucking.
Edit: And apparently it actually existed, but not anymore. :D
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u/ayinsophohr 1h ago
Well, you see the bear is on one level below the next level on which his snacks are filming from.
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u/s_corp_tc 5h ago
I would've booped him
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u/Q_S2 5h ago
Yeah....And you wouldnt have had a finger to boop anything ever again
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u/s_corp_tc 5h ago
Do not underestimate my skills
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u/ADrunkMexican 5h ago
I wouldn't underestimate a polar bear but u do u
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u/brochen 5h ago
But they’d have a really cool story about how they lost their booper.
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u/USNWoodWork 2h ago
Being able to say “Yeah.. it got bit off by a polar bear” might actually be worth losing a digit. The worry being if he was able to pull the hand or the arm through the hole.
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u/Ok-Personality-6630 2h ago
Estimated over 200ms reaction time - you could probably boop it quite easily. He's also got limited movement in the hole.
A cat would easily boop him.
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u/Sufficient_Cat9205 5h ago
Was about to say there was an opportunity for a danger boop!
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u/Old_Lead_2110 5h ago
They sound russian. Russians are very good with bears.
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u/Rapa2626 5h ago
Thats survivorship bias. Its easy to get friendly with a beer that has its belly full with 3 previous russians who tried to befriend it.
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u/assnassassins 5h ago
They wrestled it and won after the video ended
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u/shannonb0ba7841 1h ago
i wonder if they have a specific bear grappling technique they teach you there
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u/ah__there_is_another 4h ago
They are russians yes, at the start they say to film it, then wondered if they had any meat, then in the last seconds they say 'fucking hell, c'mon don't annoy/provoke him'
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u/Competitive_Fee_5829 5h ago
he sure is pretty cute though. I have no survival instincts when it is cute and furry.
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u/mantaitnow 1h ago
Yeah always wondered why our instincts tell us that they look cute, kinda same with big cats. You’re not in doubt that a great white shark doesn’t want to cuddle but I’d probably be safer next to that than a polar bear.
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u/Imbrokencantbefixed 5h ago
Why did you cut the end off? The bear jumps up the side and the once nonchalant guys all scramble to get back inside some room behind them
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u/N0tN0w0k 5h ago
Link to original video please?
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u/Imbrokencantbefixed 5h ago
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u/Pinkbeans1 3h ago
Thank you! That was crazy. People talking about boop it. That animal is terrifying and will absolutely kill you.
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u/Glittering_Crow_6382 5h ago
I mean glad they are ok, unless this footage was posted by their buddies or by the polar bear, but that said these dudes are remarkably chill about a several hundred pound animal that very much wants to and is almost smart enough to eat them being that close, I can only say if I was there the absolute urge to throw random shit at it until it’s gone would be very strong, and I say that as someone who generally respect’s nature
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u/TraveleraddictVP 5h ago
tbf he looks cute and i felt like petting him while watching.
I know... And that's why i won't grow old 😅.
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u/F0restWhispersMyName 5h ago
it’s probably just another tuesday where they are
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u/Glittering_Crow_6382 5h ago
I mean, fair enough, but that does not make things better, complacency is about as dangerous as a bear finding a way onto the ship
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u/Maleficent_Button_58 5h ago
Some people are just not very smart about how they interact with wildlife. Same kind of people who try to pet bison in Yellowstone and get smushed into the ground 😅
Ignoring that it's just a stupid reason to die... it's also traumatizing for everyone else around, their family then has to bury someone they love, and some wild animals who attack people end up getting killed for it. Real life has real consequences.
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u/machine_six 5h ago
If by random shit you mean their smaller coworkers, that could work?
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u/Glittering_Crow_6382 5h ago
I mean anything, these guys are clearly wearing hardhats, those are easy enough to replace for example
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u/CMG30 5h ago
Polar bears are one of the very few animals that actively hunt humans.
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u/Anderlinck1 4h ago
Polar bears are fucking terrifying. I guess when you live where food is hard to come by, you make sure to not miss an opportunity.
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u/RBAloysius 3h ago
What the guys on the video don’t realize is that while this bear is toying with them, there’s another silently climbing up the other side of the ship behind them…
When I was a kid and went camping with my dad, he explained to me in detail what to do if I encountered various bears. Because I was in elementary school, he taught me the saying below so I’d remember exactly what to do depending on the color of the bear. Thank goodness we never camped in the Arctic! ;)
If it’s black, fight back.
If it’s brown, lie down.
If it’s white, goodnight!
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u/AndNowAStoryAboutMe 5h ago
Understanding that is one of the most dangerous animals on earth really adds an edge to this video the people in the video seem to be missing.
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u/Ferblantierr 5h ago
I reckon these people have enough weaponry on deck guns,harpoons and the lot. It was lucky for both I reckon that he never got on board .
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u/Action-a-go-go-baby 5h ago
OoOoOoOoooh I’ve heard about this! They’re crafty as hell and will actually eat you if given the chance since they kinda just look at you as food
They’re one of the few apex predators that actively hunt humans
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u/promilew 5h ago
The insidious part of polar bear is that they look so adorable and cuddly. I know it is trying it's hardest to get into their intestines and bathe in their blood but it is just so darn adorable that i can't be frightened.
Creatures that deadly have no right to be friend shaped
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u/Subject-Dealer6350 4h ago
I have heard there are like 5 animals who consider humans as normal pray, polar bears is one of them. It definitely wants to eat them.
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u/izzy-springbolt 5h ago
Seeing polar bears in the zoo is really sad - they really do not thrive in such confined conditions and almost always suffer mental and emotional degradation.
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u/Deekers76 5h ago
“Literally trying to eat them”
Bear shows zero acts of aggression, just curiosity
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u/real_justchris 4h ago
That stupid wave the guy did would have soon stopped if the polar bear managed to jump up and over.
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u/woodbutcher6000 4h ago
Pretty sure the big floof is about to work out how to jump up there any minute
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u/foofighter000 4h ago
“What would you do for a Klondike bar”
Attempt to invade a boat full of dudes like a Somali pirate bear, apparently.
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u/GoldPack3616 3h ago
I'm not convinced that the bear couldn't have easily climbed up there in 3 seconds if only he wasn't being too cautious to actually go for it
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u/zombiehex 3h ago
He's a cutie. But he IS tring to eat me. AITA if I punch 'im in the face just to teach 'im I'm not one to be fux'd with? Or would that be bad form? I like bears, just not ones that are actively trying to eat me. Is this a teachable moment? Or should I just chill and talk shit? "YEAH! BEAR! BITCH, YOU THOUGHT! GET OUTTA' HERE, DUMMY!"
Is that too harsh?
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u/rrickitywrecked 2h ago
Can polar bears jump? Doesn’t seem like much of a challenge for an animal to clear something head-high.
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u/Livingloserlover 1h ago
“If it’s brown lay down, if it’s black fight back. If it’s white: boop it”
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u/Horan197 1h ago
That’s not a polar bear I didn’t even see a Coca Cola no nephews no nothing🙄 might be Ai
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u/Solomon_Grungy 43m ago
“I have travelled many miles from a far away place to eat you” - the polar bear (probably)
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u/Rapa2626 6h ago
Did no one actually tried to boop the nose? They only hire people with doctorates there or what?